Canine Influencers

I always tell my patients that dogs are our greatest potential influencers. Whether it be secure attachment, unconditional love, or mindfulness, dogs show us how to love well and live in the moment. They have a tremendous impact on each other and on their humans, and if we’re lucky enough to have them in our lives, we might just influence them, too.

My current dog, Frances—the first of two—was born and raised in California and, for a time, we had a housemate who was an amazing cook. And I’m not exaggerating when I say “amazing.” There was a group of us in the house, and this guy made homemade pastrami and bacon, roasted our coffee, perfected the chocolate chip cookie, and baked artisanal sourdough bread. Who knew that the bread would be Frances’ favorite—so much so that when given the choice of a piece of bacon, a shrimp, a dog treat, and Greg’s bread—she chose the bread.

After eating Greg’s bread regularly, Frances not only knew the difference between store-bought and artisanal bread; she refused to eat anything but the latter. We all found her “foodie” sensibilities hilarious. Her discernment was, in fact, so strong that even if you baked bread at home (like canned biscuits) that originally came from the store, Frances knew it wasn’t the good stuff. She would deconstruct the smell, like a sommelier before a wine tasting, deem it inferior, and walk away.

Frances was a bougie California girl, and there was no going back. At least that’s what I thought before she met Frank.

My other dog, Frank, was born and raised in Mississippi and had spent his pre-adoption days as a yard dog who guarded his master’s home. When I rescued him, it was apparent he had a history of abuse and neglect, evident in both his moniker and PTSD-like behavior. His name had been “Tick” because he had been covered in them. And he had severe anxiety to the point of panic attacks—so much so that he was on psych meds for the first three months he lived with us.

Because of Frank’s fears—and there are many (extension cords, storms, doorways, stairs, a hand coming towards his head, approaching him from behind)—he tends to be submissive. He’s also quite the gentleman, having a “ladies first” attitude when we approach doorways, insisting that I walk ahead of him. Consequently, I was shocked one morning when Frank saw a baby squirrel innocently strolling across our yard and then BAM! He went galloping in fight mode, caught that squirrel in his mouth, and proceeded to eat the entire thing—feet and fuzzy tail included—for breakfast. Well, more like dessert after breakfast.

After the incident, I looked at Frank in a whole new way. I said to him, “Damn, Frank. You’re like a psycho killer.” Qu’est-ce que c’est?

Frank’s been a member of the pack for three years now, and while he has not influenced Frances to become a “killer” too, I have witnessed them enjoying entrails after he does the dirty work. After all, dogs and wolves are 99.9% genetically identical. I just rationalized it as Frances getting in touch with her roots and let her enjoy the moment. Yet the other day, she did the unthinkable:

Frances ate store-bought bread! My precious, bougie dog who would eat nothing but artisanal sourdough boules was actually eating pre-sliced bread out of a plastic bag meant for mere peasants. At that point, I knew she had either been influenced by her brother Frank or by living in Oxford, MS—a place where “sourdough” is sweet, comes in a loaf, and is sold at the gas station.

So Frank has taught Frances to eat mass-produced bread and entrails. And he’s also taught her that going for a ride is fun and nothing to feel anxious about. Sure, the ride goes to the vet sometimes, but it also goes to parks, lakes, and other exciting places. And putting your nose out of the window while driving can be just as intoxicating as the notes of cherry in a cabernet or kefir in sourdough bread.

Frances, however, has taught Frank far more important lessons—that he can trust me to ensure they are safe, cared for, and adored. We are a pack. We are a family. We live and breathe in the now with secure attachment and unconditional love.